Okay...
...so we're not perfect, we all have that one tiny little flaw that just seems to become more noticeable the more we try to cover it up with the cheap concealer we bought at the drug store at a BOGO sale. I understand it might be hard to comprehend for those of you who still believe that you are the only other monarchy in existence other than the one in England....but it's alright. There are just a couple other billion people standing beside you on this.
I recall my existence as a five year old, napping on the stained, dusty, yet ever-loved rainbow carpet being selected as the 'Wake Up Fairy', and thinking, 'You just cannot get better than me. I also remember my teeming confidence in everything I ever did.
I am also aware that this teeming confidence 'teemed' onto other people's nerves.
But back then other people, were just that, other people. Large breathing masses that just kept annoyingly scooting the edges of their books onto my desk. I was, in my mind, thousands of miles above them all. But of course I had no sense of perspective then.
But I can also, not recall any years that were better than those...
I am sure that it was this great belief in myself that had me sure that everything was going to be o.k. because I was the bestest. Which is why those years were the best. If this what had me so known to happiness, that I didn't understand what 'sad' was.
If this confidence had grown with me, into these melodramatic, slow passing years, maybe I wouldn't have had to join speech and debate to become a confident speaker. Maybe I could have started my own club and been the leader, and started a revolution, then gone to Stanford as a thirteen year old, then graduated with a PhD in everything known to man, then travelled to Mars, survived, and even written a small picture book with pictures of Winnie the Pooh, and friends.
So tomorrow, I am going to make an effort to gain back this confidence. Tomorrow, I will look in the mirror, (this is after turning back on my resolution to not use this 'concealer', becoming frustrated that my cheap concealer is STILL not working), and I am going to tell my self, I am the bestest, because I am...
Then that afternoon, I will go buy a concealer of better quality...
But hey, at least I tried....
Ciao!
